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Angela discovered a whole new person—her real self—to share with her husband.At the end of that long and arduous process, they were able to stand before the congregation and share their testimony of healing without shame.Everybody needs this special set-apart world—it's a big part of what makes marriage special.To continue to rebuild the trust and intimacy in the relationship you will need to integrate the message of the affair into your new way of relating.But the best part is that they know for certain that they have forgiven one another.As a result, they know that their relationship is growing closer as time goes by, not more distant.Step 1: Review contributing factors Factors both inside and outside the marriage combined to cause the affair, and it's helpful to review them. "Rats don't have mice" goes a popular saying, and affairs do tend to run in families.I'd wager a guess that there have either been full-blown affairs in your family tree or at least "close calls." It is imperative that you go back to your parents and grandparents to find out your history.
Knowing your family heritage can help you change it in your generation so that you do not pass it on to your kids.Remember, forgiveness is a process; all the characteristics of genuine forgiveness will not always be present, but they should become increasingly apparent along the journey.The recovery of intimacy An entangled affair is always the result of an intimacy deficit in the marital relationship.As a result, Stuart developed an entirely new respect for her.When Angela chose to forgive her husband, Stuart knew it was for real this time, and he could therefore begin to grieve his losses.
When Angela finally got angry and both she and Stuart began to grieve, it was like a huge festering sore that had finally been lanced.